To my fellow softies,
First of all, I want to say hey! I’m so stoked to virtually meet you. My name is Mariann Roberts, and like a lot of you, I am a total softie. I am a sensitive, soft and emotional person, and I am damn proud of it. I also happen to be the new blogger for Stay Soft, which I couldn’t be more thrilled about. I wanted to dedicate this first blog post to helping you get to know me better, so if/when you feel comfortable, you can let me get to know you a little better, too. Why? Because you matter. You’re special, you’re unique and you are genuinely so important. I want to let you know that we’re in this together, and we got this.
I want to be as open and transparent with you as possible. No filters, no façade, no sugar coating, just the raw and honest truth. I feel like we can’t break through our invisible chains if we don’t trust each other. So, this is me, emotionally naked, raw and ready to fight this battle with you.
I know what it’s like. I know what it’s like to have someone that no one else can see tighten its suffocating grip around your ribcage at 2am. I know how it feels to have those invisible hands weigh you down to the confinements of your bed, to the point where getting up is the only thing that could be more exhausting than laying down. I know those invisible hands named depression. Depression visits me unannounced. It barges in unexpectedly and pushes past the shield of my smile. It hijacks my mind and controls my body. Like enemy intruders taking over the mothership, it forces me to attack my allies with hurtful words, and sends raging missiles of guilt, sadness and emptiness throughout the home-base of my body. Depression is mean and crafty in its attacks, but it has not won the battle. Nope. You and me, we are the victors. Despite depression’s masked missions and unannounced warfare, we are still standing. The fact that you are here today, reading this blog post means that you have won today’s battle, and I am so proud of you for that. I know how hard it is, and I know you’re tired, but please know that you are a warrior like no other, and your strength is outstanding.
I know another nasty intruder who cloaks itself with invisibility. It is the malicious cousin of depression, known as anxiety. I’m going to be honest here (as promised), anxiety gets the best of me more often than I would like to admit. Anxiety and depression work as a team in their ambush attacks. Depression will storm through the gates and anxiety will linger in the depths of my mind, tormenting me relentlessly. Anxiety has many disguises when it comes banging on my door, making it hard for me to recognize when it’s about to burst inside (although I am starting to learn how to recognize it, slowly. So, that’s an accomplishment). For the longest time, I didn’t realize what anxiety was even when it had taken over my body. I thought falling into spiralling fits of panic was just me being a worry wart. I thought torturing myself by playing scenarios over and over and over again in my head was something that everyone did. I thought lying awake with worry and then being shaken awake with panic just meant I had a lot on my mind. I didn’t know crying uncontrollably, fighting to breathe and curling up on the floor was the result of an enemy invader pouring poison into my mind. Oh, and the crushing weights on my chest? I’ve learned that’s one of anxiety’s signature moves. Regardless, just like depression, anxiety is losing this battle. The crown of victory still lays on the heads of you and me. If you’ve ever had
to experience anything like this, even for a moment, I want you to know you are not alone and your strength is breathtaking. Like I said, we got this.
This community of love, support and emotional pride is a huge reason why I’m so thrilled to be a part of the Stay Soft team. I fell in love with the message of this brand back in the summer, and I started wearing the apparel as sort of badge of honour. It was a way for me to silently say, yeah I’m soft, yeah I’m a warrior, and yeah I’m proud of it. Hell freaking yeah. Loving my emotional side and admitting my struggles is something I never knew I was allowed to embrace, but through this community I am now learning that being soft is a part of who I am, and that’s an amazing thing. It makes me the warrior I am today, and I am proud of it. I am proud of all of us.
Well softies, I think this is my cue to wrap things up. I really can’t express how excited I am to be a part of this community, and to get to know such incredible people like you. You are a total bad ass, emotions and all. Stay brave, stay you, and stay soft.
Until next time ❤